I been gettin’ a new job, suckas.
Which only partially explains why I haven’t posted in, oh, three weeks. See, I got a new job, but I also took a week off between quitting my old one and starting the new one. I didn’t have Internet access, and I was blissfully and blessedly away from all things technological. Um, except the credit card reader at Ann Taylor. That c.c. swiper and I are total besties now. Love you, Swipey!
Wow, that was weird.
Anyway, I’d hinted a few times about what I did at my old job. But here’s the full scoop. I wrote clothing and activity guides for the web and wrote copy for catalogs at an outdoor clothing and gear company called Sierra Trading Post. Anyone interested in working there, take note; don’t do it. It is a hellhole, not unlike Auschwitz. And since they have given me my last paycheck (AND BECAUSE I AM WRITING NOTHING BUT THE TRUTH), I can say these things without repercussion.
For example, the head of the company sent out a memo a few months ago that we were not to listen to music during the day, even though, at least in my department, we didn’t deal with customers and worked creative jobs which sometimes required outside inspiration, like music. The memo also stated that we were no longer allowed to keep food or eat at our desks (even though a lot of people worked through lunch and were unable to take the time to go to the lounge and eat). This caused some civil unrest and prompted employees to turn their co-workers in to their supervisors for violating the rule. We were also discouraged from talking to our co-workers about non-work-related topics at all times because we were wasting company time and time is money.
In addition, a new couch was put in an employee break area and not one, but two people reported to my boss that I had my shoed foot tucked up underneath me on the couch. And I was going to ruin the precious couch! (Oh, excuse me, I thought a couch placed in a break area was for actually sitting on. How silly of me to sit on a couch! And, people, if you have a problem with a shoe on the couch, come up and tell me, don’t go tattle to my boss. Unless you’re in pre-school. Then it’s perfectly acceptable behavior.) This prompted my boss to write me a detailed e-mail about professionalism in the workplace. Hilarious coming from a woman who cried all the time during staff meetings and couldn’t bother to wear clean clothes to work.
The final week I was there, the company also issued a mandate that certain appointed individuals were allowed to check all employee’s bags and…wait for it…cars, either randomly or if there was a susupicion of theft. Sorry, I didn’t feel like busting my ass for a company that treated me like a criminal.
I think the biggest slight though was that I got my byline taken away when I published work to the web. I wrote it, my name should be on it. But alas…
At the end of my time at Sierra Trading Post, the job that I was hired to do was phased out and I was forced into a copywriting position, a job I purposely didn’t apply for when I was first trying to get on with the company. (Writing copy for a bunch of God-awful closeout clothing wasn’t really how I wanted to use my English degree. Sorry.)
So I found an amazing new job and gave my two weeks’ notice.
I was harrassed by my former boss for taking vacation days during my last two weeks at work, even though if I didn’t take my vacation days, I wouldn’t be reimbursed for them. My two immediate bosses wouldn’t look me in the eye, let alone speak to me, after I gave my notice and then wondered why I didn’t stick around to say my grateful and gracious goodbyes.
But my favorite part about leaving was when I was told to come in on my day off to have an “exit” interview with the head of HR-the interview could not possibly have been done over the phone or, you know, not at all-and then he stood me up. Very professional.
The only unfortunate thing about me quitting is that I left behind three lovely girls in my office that I miss dearly day-to-day. (Girls, I’m sorry I wasn’t in touch the last few weeks. I was sorting out my feelings about leaving and trying to get over some things that were said to me upon my departure that I didn’t want to burden you all with. You have to work with those people after all! Can we be friends again now?)
But sometimes you need to sacrifice things you love to make your life better overall. That was the decision I had to make when changing jobs. And, let me tell you, my life is so much better at my new job. And all the people here are very nice, and pretty, and shiny even and the halls are paved with gold. And I’m writing this post while eating at my desk in my own office and listening to music out loud, without headphones, and snorting free cocaine.
Okay, that part about the gold-paved hallways isn’t true.
